Monday, August 30, 2010

I'd like to start off by telling you all a story to explain my views and hopefully raise some awareness about the dangers of Fruit.  It started off like any regular day, I was late for school and decided to grab a Banana to eat on my walk there.  I had never liked Fruit, but my mom kept pushing it on me and i'll admit that the health class propaganda(or the Freemason Food Pyramid, more on that later) had gotten to me.  So I peeled back the first layer, suspiciously inedible, and took a sniff.  It had a faint chemical smell, but I passed it off as the scent of pesticide in the air from the neighboring lawns.  After a moment of trepidation, I took a small bite.  Sickly sweet, it reminded me of the battlefield after a war, or perhaps the First Sin.  I chewed, and swallowed.  I waited a minute or two, and with no adverse effects I took another bite; this one bigger and more ravenous.  This stuff was addictive.  Before I knew it, I had eaten the entire thing and tossed the Peel onto the sidewalk like a teenage delinquent.  I was just rounding the bend and the school was in sight when it hit me.  MASSIVE PANIC ATTACK.  Everything after that was a blur, but needless to say, I awoke on a hospital bed, arms strapped to my sides.  They told me that they had ended up pumping my stomach, and that if I had let that Poison fester in my stomach any longer I probably would have died.
I drew this picture from memory.


  1. I don't see how you can find this humorous, but thanks for following I guess.